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No New Planet Hulk Movie, Gonna Have to Stick with Animation

It’s officially been declared a few days ago that there will be no new Planet Hulk movie by AICN. The rumors started at the Latino Review has been effectively hulk smashed. I’m not going to say that I am horribly disappointed. As a big fan of original Planet Hulk movie, I hope that this hype has brought it some more attention. I’m kind of hoping that for Avengers 2, they decide to infect Hulk with a virus and reenact the events of World War Hulk… The background story

In any case, it seems like the main issue lies with Marc Ruffalo. The new Bruce Banner has signed a contract for 6 years with Marvel, and would not be able to be featured in Planet Hulk. Why? If you haven’t read the comics or watched the Planet Hulk movie, the reason is that Bruce Banner is simply not featured in that story arc. Dr. Banner is so pissed off from being shot off into space that he simply remains in Hulk form the whole time.

In any case, for those who are whining, just pick up the animated movie. It’s worth the watch and you’ll get your new Planet Hulk movie. Any more you have not yet seen is new in my book.

Comics

The Bruce Banner Song – Sally Robos

Two sisters called Kiersten and Stephanie, Sally Robos on Youtube, made this really cool fan song about Bruce Banner. It kind of makes him out to be a bit more emotional then I believe he truly is, but that’s just my interpretation of the man behind the Incredible Hulk. Also, I thought Bruce Banner lives in a cabin in the wild so that he could avoid people, not a manor! In fact, in my nerdy opinion, they might have made more than just one mistake in their depiction of Bruce Banner. Either way, the song is cure and I’ve listened to it way too much.

I’m not going to lie. The song scared me at one point, so be prepared to jump.

The Bruce Banner Song Lyrics

My Name is Bruce Banner
I’m usually in my manor
I’m really one of the nicest guys
But I have a secret that’s too big to hide

Today I’d like to raise a family
But no house is big enough to hide me
If my kids ever threw a fit
Well, that would be the end of it

So going back to my big secret
It all started when I got hit
With an experiment
That ran away
And quickly changed my DNA

Wish I could be just an ordinary scientist
But now if I get angered, even in the slightest
This flash of light
And my close get tight
And they think I might

ARGHAGSADGSAHHHHHHHHHh
ATRHGASHHAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
ARHGHAHHHHHHHHHHHH
ATAHGASDHSDHSAH

That’s what I was talking about
I just cannot let my feelings out
I try to be more of a wall flower
But it’s hard when you are nothing but raw power

Join the Avengers would be a dream come true
But I think it’s something I can not due
Maybe they will treat me with love and kindness
Or maybe they will be left cleaning up my mess

I might have gotten the lyrics wrong, but just comment bellow if you can’t sing along

Comics

World War Hulk: X-Men Review

Hulk World War: Hulk X-Men ComicsI decided to pick up a few of the World War Hulk comics after reading that Joe Carnahan wants to do a World War Hulk Movie. I had to choose between the actual World War Hulk books or World War Hulk: X-Men. I picked up the later because I was hoping to get a glimpse of my second favourite Marvel character, Gambit. Sadly, he did not appear in the issue… At least, I wasn’t expecting to see the Green Goliath transform back into Bruce Banner!

In 2007, three issues were released for the X-Men World War Hulk mini-series. The story was written by Christos Gage and drawn by Andera Di Vito. The duo also worked together for Civil War: House of M mini-series in 2005. I really like Di Vito’s drawing style. It’s very cartoonish. Of course, the occasional scene is sometimes a bit sketchy, but overall the art work is amazing. Laura Villari does great work colouring the panels as well!

Storyline

In World War Hulk: X-Men, the Green Goliath seeks out Professor Xavier. The Worldbreaker a.k.a. Green Scar a.k.a. the Hulk wants to know whether Xavier would have voted against his exile from Earth. Yet, the X-Men do not trust the Incredible Hulk. They believe the Green Scar wants to kill Professor Xavier! This means that for three whole comic books, you get to see the Hulk fight almost all the top X-Men! I’m surprise how witty the Incredible Hulk is! I actually chuckled a few times while reading the books.

I really don’t have much negative things to say about the World War Hulk: X-Men mini-series. The art is good, the story is really fun but I guess the ending is a bit disappointing…

Comics Movies

Possible World War Hulk Movie?

In an interview, the director Joe Carnahan hints at his upcoming dream project: a big budget blockbuster based on World War Hulk comic series by Greg Pak. I really hope that the movie surpasses the numerous problems with Hulk (2003). I will be watching the 2008 Hulk movie soon.

Hulk World War Hulk Hard CoverI would love to make a World War Hulk film.. you know that comic where Hulk takes on Charles Xavier, Tony Stark and all of Earth’s heroes and just [obliterates them]? That would be amazing to do! Maybe they’ll let me completely destroy Manhattan [laughs]. I think the character itself is so full of depth…I’m more of a fan of Ang Lee’s Hulk [movie] because it really captured that Jekyll and Hyde feel. I love seeing Hulk be docile and calm when he’s alone but go totally ballistic when anyone messes with him. If I could do it for $20 million, even better.
Joe Carnahan

I haven’t picked up the World War Hulk comics, but I am planing to soon because I really loved the Planet Hulk film. World War Hulk is essentially the follow-up to the Incredible Hulk’s adventures on Sakaar.

Cartoons Comics

The Incredible Hulk Theme Songs

I really enjoy music in cartoons. I decided to check out all the Incredible Hulk theme music. I’d have to say that the best composers are from the The Marvel Super Heroes cartoon 1966 and The Incredible Hulk 1996. It’s kind of cool that both of these animated television series both came out in years that end with the number six. Anyways, here are all the themes songs from the introductions of the television series dedicated to Bruce Banner and his green alter-ego!

Hulk (1966) Theme Song

Lyrics

Doc Bruce Banner,
Belted by gamma rays,
Turned into the Hulk.

Ain’t he unglamor-ous!

Wreckin’ the town
With the power of a bull,

Ain’t no monster clown
Who is as lovable.

As ever-lovin’ Hulk! HULK!! HULK!!

The Incredible Hulk (1978) Theme Song

The Incredible Hulk (1982) Theme Song

The Incredible Hulk (1996) Theme Song

Comics

Son Of The Hulk

Could not sleep. Here’s a funny Youtube video about the son of Hulk. This boy is unlike Skaar, Hiro-Kala or any other of Bruce Banner’s official Marvel offspring. I laughed, but I might just be tried. For an amateur video, Dr. Banner’s son’s transformation into the “Incredible Hulk” is pretty well done. I really like the fact that the actor playing the true Green Goliath’s son is wearing purple pants.

Either way, I guess the actual Hulk’s father was right, there is a monster gene that runs in the family.

Comics

Hulk Webcomics

I was stumbling around various Hulk blogs and discovered two pretty good indy Incredible Hulk webcomics: Incredible Hulk Library’s Webcomic and The Smashy Adventures of the Hulk. I was pretty disappointed because both seem to be defunct. In other words, the authors have stopped updating their awesome creations. Yet, Katie Cook, the author of Smashy Adventures, is still updates her official site regularly with her current projects.

Cute Hulk Webcomic

The Smashy Adventures of the Hulk does not feature Bruce Banner. Yet, I like it better than Julio’s webcomic. Why? It’s funny and portray’s the Hulk in a innovative fashion. Instead of being as a violent time-bomb, the Green Goliath is shown to be a child at heart. I couldn’t agree more that the Savage Hulk is really just like an innocent child who is constantly getting picked at. The only difference is that a normal child can’t destroy a tank in one punch.

I really like Katie Cook’s work because she isn’t trying to expand on the Hulk story. She is just having fun with the character. You really need to check this out if you are a Hulk fan.

You can read the first Hulk fan comics by Katie Cook‘s cute Hulk webcomic here

Hulk Library Webcomic

For a fan made comic, the Hulk Library does a pretty good job with it’s generically named Incredible Hulk Webcomic. The art is decent and the story isn’t bad. I’d rather read a real Hulk issue then try to follow the plot written by Julio Molino-Muscara. It’s not as interesting as Marvel’s… To tell the truth, I just really hate the way Julio draws Bruce Banner.

Read the first update of Julio Molino-Muscara’s Webcomic

Comics

Best Use Of Hulk Merch Ever!

The best way to use the Incredible Hulk Smash Hands, Power Glow Mask and Halloween costume is to make awesome videos. These kids on Youtube made a series of Hulk episodes. I think it’s funny because the Hulk punches a small girl in the face.

SPOILER: The girl does not cry. She’s an assassin.

I really wish I had produced cool stuff like this when I was a kid. I spent my time playing RPG’s and going to Italian school on weekends.

If you want to check out more of these indy Hulk parody made by kids on THEQULKMAN’s Youtube Channel.

Comics Movies

How Many Minutes of Hulk (2003) Can You Endure?

I was only able to watch 40 minutes. The 2003 Hulk film is horrible. It reminded me of my attempt to watch Invisible Mom. I waited for 60 minutes and the mom had still not turned invisible yet. The big difference is that I had very low expectations for Invisible Mom.

Since I didn’t watch Ang Lee’s Hulk completely, I won’t bore you with the plot. You can blame James Schamus for a story that has almost nothing to do with Stan Lee and Jack Kirby’s green Marvel character. Why didn’t the screenplay writers complain? I’m looking at you, Jack Turman, Michael France and James Schamus. I guess you guys were just doing your job. Instead, you’ll reading about what caused me to stop watching Hulk (2003).

So Many Random Animals

The movie begins with some animal cruelty scenes. I have no idea why they decided to do this. I mean I appreciate zooming on cute animals as much as anyone else. Yet, movie director Ang Lee used it way too much. During the intro, you get close-ups on lab experiments involving starfish, lizards, sea cucumbers and monkeys. I’m surprised there were no rats. I guess they aren’t a cool enough animal. On the other hand, I’m pretty sure Ang Lee or another member of the Hulk movie crew really likes dogs. Why else would David Banner (Bruce Banner’s father) be followed by a bunch of dogs? Maybe it’s explained later in the movie, but I just thought it was a stupid addition to this alternate Incredible Hulk universe.

Horrible Character Casting / Acting

I have been disappointed by character casting ever since I watched either the first Spider-Man or X-Men movie. I have to say that Avy Kaufman and Franklyn Warren did a worse job casting actors for the 2003 Hulk movie than whoever worked on The Fantastic Four movie. Jessica Alba as the Invisible Woman?

Jennifer Connelly as Betty Ross and Eric Bana as Bruce Banner aren’t that bad. Some critics have claimed that the acting is excellent. I have to state that it really isn’t. The performance of the main characters reminds me of my favorite B-Movies. The problem is that Hulk is not supposed to be a B-Movie, even if the CGI frog and horrible 3-D Hulk animations suggest the contrary.

My biggest issue is with Glen Talbot. In the Incredible Hulk comics, Glen is portrayed as a hardcore military man with brown hair and a pencil mustache. Josh Lucas, the actor chosen to portray Glen in the movie, is a blond business man. Is it that hard to find an actor that looks similar to the comic book character? It wasn’t in 2008 when they remade a Hulk movie. I’m guessing Marvel and film makers realized how bad this one was.

All is not bad, the highlight of my 40 minute online movie watching session was witnessing a “cameo” by Daniel Dae Kim. In case you haven’t watched TV in a long time, Dae Kim plays Jin-Soo Kwon, the Korean castaway in Lost. This was my favorite moment in the whole movie. I doubt I would of gained anything better if I had watched the remaining 90 minutes. Yes, the movie is over 2 hours!

Hulk Movie Causes Nerd Rage

Here is a list of everything that got the nerd inside of me angry.

  1. Brian Banner is named David and he is not an alcoholic.
  2. Brian does not beat his child and wife at Christmas. Why do a Christmas scene?
  3. Bruce Banner was not exposed to radiation as a child.
  4. The whole Hulk origin story is badly done. I actually don’t really know what happened because after 40 minutes, Bruce Banner had yet to transform into the Green Goliath.
  5. If you decide to buy Hulk, you can probably find more reasons to rage.

Concerns For Impressionable Youth

Why do Bruce Banner’s lab partners make fun of him for wearing a bicycle helmet? Aren’t movie targeted towards young viewers supposed to encourage being safe? This really grinds my gears. Maybe I shouldn’t be surprise that an action movie does not focus on safety and good behavior.

Hulk (2003) Movie Review Recap

Overall, the movie was horrible. I only watch as much as I did because I told myself I had to watch at least 30 minutes. The problem with Hulk is that it begins with pointless and confusing background story. The plot itself is confusing and more complicated than the simple comic book origins story. Also, using flashbacks of flashbacks within flashbacks is not a good story telling technique.

The video editing seems like it was done by me. In other words, by someone who has no skills and, therefore, aims to get cheesiness, lack of effort and funny points. Lots of pointless zooming on faces and transition effects.

Only watch this movie if you have some time to waste.

Comics Movies

Going To Watch Hulk (2003)

I know this movie is really old, but I’ve never seen any of the Hulk films. Obviously, I’m not including the animated movies. I decided to check out the trailer first and I’ve already noticed some flagrant differences. First, Brian Banner does not seem like an alcoholic abusive father and didn’t kill Rebecca. Either way, you should be looking forward to a review soon!